Tuesday, October 5, 2010

A perfect ending to a not-so-perfect day

My day ended with this beautiful sunset and an evening spent with my daughter Moira.  (Dave is away, so it was just the two of us.)  I made fish chowder for supper, and Moira baked biscuits, which turned out great!  We are now settled in watching the remake of Escape to Witch Mountain.  Now I must admit, the Rock is amusing in this flick, but I still prefer the original...Eddy Albert in a flying motor home just can't be beat! lol

I am grateful for this happy ending, because my day got off to a lousy start.  I was just getting ready to head out the door for work when the phone rang.  It was a member of my discernment committee, letting me know that tonight's meeting was cancelled because another member couldn't make it.  Now I already knew about the person who couldn't make it, but hadn't occurred to me that the meeting would be cancelled altogether.  I figured the reason for having three reps from my church and two from presbytery was so that we could still meet even if one person was absent...because all parties would still be represented.  Unless of course I was the one who couldn't make it. Since it's my discernment committee, there wouldn't be much point in the others meeting in my absence!

Now one cancelled meeting wouldn't normally be a big deal, but considering how long it took to get started in the first place, I must confess I am rather frustrated by yet more delays.

[To recap the journey so far:
Last February, after a lot of personal discernment and conversation with family and friends, I decided to answer what feels like God's call to ordained ministry, so I wrote a letter, asking that a formal discernment committee be set up, and gave it to Valerie.  She brought it forward at our congregation's annual meeting in early March, where it was approved at church council level and forwarded to presbytery.  In mid April, I heard back that my request has been approved by presbytery.  Three committee members were named from my church, and two members from presbytery.  They had a training session to familiarize themselves with the process, but didn't meet with me until June.  And we didn't even get through all the housekeeping items in that first meeting...a couple things had to be parked until the second meeting. I was incredibly and intensely frustrated at the time!]

So...here we are, another four months have passed, and meeting #2 has been cancelled. Sigh. I wasn't even consulted, the meeting was just cancelled without my input.  Not that I don't highly value the person who couldn't make it, because I do, but I see no reason the rest of us couldn't have met as planned, and filled her in later.  (Deep breaths...prayer...more deep breaths...let it go, I tell myself, just let it go.)  As I said to her, I think God is testing my patience!  Which is not a bad thing, to be honest, and I know the Spirit is present in all of this somehow...I just need to hang on to the knowledge that if it's meant to be, it will be.  No point in wasting my energy fretting over that which I cannot control.  I don't actually feel anywhere near as frustrated as I did around the first meeting...I am definitely getting better at trusting that I will, in fact, end up precisely where God is calling me to be (even if that place is not where I myself currently want to go!)

And now...back to the end of my day.  I rejoice in the uplifting beauty of sunsets and the heartwarming sound of laughter on my beloved daughter's lips!  For this and so much more, I feel deeply blessed and profoundly grateful.  Hallelujah and amen!!


Trekcapri said...

Hi Anne, I'm sorry that your meeting got cancelled. I hope that they will be able to reschedule it soon for you. I'm so looking forward to following along on your journey. I love sunsets too. I find them to soothing and comforting. Hope you have a better day today.

barb cabot said...

I feel your frustration but glad your day ended well with Moira and the sunset. Thinking of you and hoping the meeting gets rescheduled and is a go soon.

Annie said...

I love it...deep breaths, prayer, deep breaths, prayer. Perfect way to deal with frustrating challenges!

That is such an awesome sky.

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